I sat down with Troy West and Jill Nelson, owners of Empower Fitness, a untypical gym in downtown Portland. I wanted to get their professional and personal opinions and experiences with weight, and any other insight that they could be to the subject. What follows is my interview with them.

Jill Nelson: I’ll give you a personal story, it goes back long before I knew Troy. When I turned 41, I had one of those mid-life things…it wasn’t a crisis, it was just, “Oh my God I’m 41!” At that point I realized I wasn’t happy with my life, I wasn’t happy with my relationship, wasn’t happy with my weight, wasn’t happy with my job. Basically there wasn’t anything in my life I really liked. I made it a personal agenda to change all of that including my weight.

I think one of the things that changed for me in my 40’s was that I hired a personal trainer, I joined an gym, I dropped 30 pounds, you know…I made that significant change in my life. And I’ve pretty much maintained that over the last 10 years to the point where, I’m not that far off from my high school weight. Probably not the same shape as high school because I swam competitively. It’s just become a life style for me.

There are things like…we went to a body building show to cheer on one of our clients and one of our trainers that were there. I was telling Troy, “Yeah, I could look like that…if I wanted to.” But I like eating too much. There’s things in life that I enjoy, so I’ve made it my own life style to balance my exercise, make sure I exercise and that I eat well and feel good and to me that’s what it’s all about.

It doesn’t hurt to have access to a facility like this (meaning Empower Fitness which she and Troy own) where I can come in a couple of times a week and work out.

Troy:(photo at left) It is about life style. That’s where the bike shop in the gym comes in, why we are surrounding ourselves with this…it’s because we want people to get out do stuff. It’s much easier to get people addicted to doing something, than it is to their mirror. It’s giving people things they want to do. Jill just brought that up, “I can look like that if I want to,” what kind of confidence is that? That’s fantastic!
That’s a healthy prospective on things…do I want to? Can I do it? Do I have the talent? I don’t know, but I can do it, because physically I know I can. That’s what we call Empower Fitness, that’s why it’s called Empower. The ability to do what you want without your body becoming a hinderance. It’s just a fact.

She could change and work towards it…would she win? I don’t know? Would I win if I decided to be a body builder? Probably not. Genetically it’s not probably not my strong suite. But could I? Yes…sure.

Jill: My personal experience, especially in the perspective of a gym is that not everybody is into gyms. But for some people, it is a critical part of their exercise routine. A lot of that is more mental.

It’s like going to a job, rather than working from home…

Jill Nelson of Empower Fitness

Have you talked to Kendall Clawson?

We wanted to but we never connected thoroughly.

Jill: Yeah…Kendall has her own program and the stuff that works for her and she’s…well, I don’t know if she still is…but at one point she was evangelistic about it. You know, “This worked for me, this is great, come do it!” Most of us, if we find something that works, we want to share it. And that’s important, you want to have people doing it with you, it reinforces what you’re doing it makes you feel good.

Troy: But remember it’s their thing…just because you have a friend and it works for you doesn’t mean it’s going to work for everyone. Just like everybody is genetically different.

Well and you know…like Marty Davis in Just Out, she spent part of her editorial some months ago about “the losers.” She was expressing how she was tired of hearing or reading about all the people who were losing all this weight, trying to get others involved etc. That’s not the first time she’s talked about her weight…but it’s a great example of how, say here’s Kendall (or anyone who finds something that works) and she’s evangelistic about it…and plus-size people who aren’t ready just don’t want to hear it.

Troy: What system is that?

Jill: Take Shape for Life…

Troy: Ah, yeah…it’s the Medicare deal… based on a program they used to drop weight of overly obese people when they needed to do surgery on them. My only problem with that is that the people who prescribe them…it’s the same thing with hair dressers, they don’t have the associates degrees. It’s not a bad system. It is a medically based system, but just because a doctor came up with it at one time doesn’t mean…it’s like everybody has to have appendix surgery…why? Because I removed an appendix.

Jill: The cool thing about those programs and things is that…Troy will give me a hard time because I’m a huge proponent of The South Beach Diet. I love it because it works really well for me. But I have people who I talk to who loathe it. Mostly because, if you like those kinds of foods, then The South Beach Diet is great for you. If you can’t stand eggs and you can’t live without pasta, The South Beach Diet is probably not a good thing.

Troy: You can break it down to this: somewhere between what’s called a 70-20-10 diet. Which is more like a vegetarian. So you’re talking about 70% of calories coming from carbohydrates, 20% coming from protein, 10% coming from fats. Between that and what’s classically called The Zone diet, 40-30-30; it is going to be within a natural basis. But if you’re talking about weight loss, you’re talking about one thing: calories in vs. calories out.

Is it really that cut and dry?

Troy: It’s that freakin’ easy. That’s all it is. Now nutrition is different. Nutrition and Weight loss are two totally different animals. Completely separate. Nutrition is the amount of vitamins, minerals, the entire up tick of what your doing to your system, how well you balance your food with of your muscles and nervous system…it’s really a science. That’s the reason there’s a science to it.

Programs like Take Shape for Life, that’s fine. What they are is they have a lot of vitamins and nutrients directly in them. You follow a formula, where you do X amount of calories according to what your weight is at. All pre-done meals.

Yes, delivered to your door.

Troy: The reason it works so well is that it is because it’s pretty close to a 40-30-30 diet. It’s really close to that. The higher amount of fats you have in you the fuller you feel. Carbohydrates go through your system fastest because they do nutrients for the nervous system and muscles right off the bat, anything that’s extra gets stored. Protein takes about three hours to get through your system which is why you have a fuller feel, but it’ll go through you and in three hours, you’ll feel hungry again. Fats have about a five hour process that goes on.
Something like that plan, you eat throughout the day and you have a little bit of 40-30-30, it balances you out and you cut your calorie count by about 800 calories…well, this is how easy it is to lose weight. One pound of fat is 3,500 calories. If you cut a deficit every day of 500, well at the end of the week, you’ve lost a pound. Simple math.

So you put that on a diet that somebody’s cutting a calorie count of 1,00 calories, “Oh my God! I’ve lost so much weight!” But you’ve also lowered your metabolism without exercise. Without exercise with it, you’re gonna gain it back!

Jill: Which is why if I sprinted 8,000 yards a day in high school, I could eat a Snickers bar. When I quit doing that, and I quit swimming? All of a sudden that Snickers bar turned into a pound of fat on my ass within a week!

So is there anything else you need to know from us? Other than anyone who doesn’t know or can’t figure out how to get into shape should come see us?
id: I think we’re done…Oh! The education part…how do you do that?

Troy: We teach first. We show you what the program is, why you’re doing it, what part of the anatomy it’s working, why it’s working, why to do it. You don’t get that elsewhere. You can’t even get trainers to write down things, because they’re worried that their clients will become independent and won’t need them anymore. That’s what happens after “The Biggest Loser.”

Jill: Let me give you the Reader’s Digest answer to that: Education is built into everything we do. Whether it is your first health assessment, to your first training session, every class. Our classes range from bands or resistance work, yoga classes…everything is going to teach you what it is and why it is we do what we do. Any private one on one sessions, our trainers are all instructed to make sure that the client walks out with an understanding of not just what to do but why why they’re doing it.

That’s fundamental to how Troy trains. Even when people are working out in the gym, if he walks in and he sees someone doing something that’s not quite right, or their form is not quite right, he’ll stop and correct…he’ll explain why the form should be different and how the form should be different. You can work out at 24 hour fitness for six months and not have a single person speak to you. You could be something wrong for six months and never have someone teach you how to do it right, that doesn’t happen here. So education is an intrical part of what happens here, it’s not just sign up for a diet class or motivation workshop.

Troy: One excuse killer…it works to our advantage and disadvantage. It’s not the gym you go to that you have an excuse of why it didn’t work. It’s always been the work, just whether you’re going to stick with it or not. It works positive and negative on things. It’s a long road to haul, but to re-education people is different. There’s people that come in here and say, “Oh I know what’s best for me.” No you don’t or you wouldn’t be in the shape you’re in. We do a fitness test to see where people are, we don’t base it off of weight. We do the test to see physically where you are. I’ve had people come in that are way obese and they’re technically in shape, heart rate is low, recovery heart rate is low…You can’t tell something by the package.

Well, in doing research for this topic, I came across the Fat Haters…I would have never known about them. They’re vicious!

Troy: They’re horrible. They’ve got problems…but they usually have hand in hand with their own body dysmorphia. They’re self-loathers. It’s like the closeted anti-gay guy. The guy that goes out and says, “Kill all the fags!”

Jill: That’s so typical! A closeted behavior, no matter what it is, if you’re a closeted overeater, closeted purger, closeted homosexual…you’re always going to create the image of the exact opposite.

Troy: Fat doesn’t equal lazy. And that is a point they like to use…and it’s usually learned behavior. I’ve usually used combat for one of the things that was quite easy for me. You know…the day that you can actually beat me? You can talk. because I was fat as a kid, I was a chubby kid who played football and played violin. That was hard, it was really difficult. Throw on top of that a weight problem. But I was also the kid who if you ever said anything, I’d literally kick your ass…didn’t matter one way or another. I grew into that with the Marine Corp, barely met weight standards with a 300 PFT (Physical Fitness Test.)
I run into that all the time. I have people that come in and say, “How could you?” Easily – because I’m the best of the best. By educating yourself out of those things. With any kind of hate, it’s usually ignorance.

Well, see that’s what we’re trying to do here with the magazine. It’s parallel to what Basic Rights Oregon is doing with repealing measure 36 in 2012. The way they intend to win is to win the hearts and minds of Oregonians by having one on one conversations. With id Magazine, it’s our mission to Educate, Motivate and Inspire. Introducing people everywhere, especially Oregon, but introducing to people to community members they might learn something from, or may be inspired by. If it happens to be a straight person that was ignorant, and it changes their mind, then we’ve done our job.

Troy: Here’s what’s very interesting…you’ll run into fat haters everywhere, in all cultures. Whether you’re gay or not, I’ve made a lot of friends in Portland and my business partner is gay. I’ve run into a lot of fat haters in the gay community. I find that really super-twisted sick. But it’s a matter of body dysmorphia. I find it sick, but not angry sick. Usually hatred inspires pity. Because physically they can’t do anything to me, frankly. I gotten to the point now, what are you going to do.

Right. What strikes me is that we have a majority of people who don’t like us in the nation. But in our own community we have ignorance about things we know nothing about or don’t understand. We have prejudice against people that we don’t resinate with.

Troy: Blacks do it too, whites do it. Cowboys do it! I grew up in Wyoming…”We’re real cowboys!” “No! WE’RE REAL cowboys!” You’re both rednecks, now shut the hell up! It’s gonna happen in everything. I had roommates in the Marine Corps. who were black and felt bad because they were lighter skinned-blacks. One of by very best friends was a very dark black man. He felt bad because he was really dark, and he was outcast.

Jill: It is a basic element of human nature that breaks things down to Us’ and Them’s. We struggle constantly because of our basis tribe mentality, to overcome that. And we just don’t do that very well.

Troy: With fitness it happens too. I had a gentleman that comes in here and he said we needed to get more hot boys in here. He said he’d come workout more often if we got more hot boys to come in. You’ve got to be kidding me! He’s a supporter, a great guy and everything else, but it shocked me. “Well, it’s perceived as an old guy gym,” he said…what do you mean? Half of our population of our gym is under 29, that doesn’t make any sense. Just because most of the people that use our trainers want to go out screamin’ and “Oh shit! I better take care of it now!”

I saw Raquel Welch on Oprah and she was just amazing, she had to have had surgery, for her age to look THAT good. But that’s a great target market for you guys, that part of the population.

Jill: The baby-boomer generation, they are at that age where they’re worried about their weight, they’re worried about their health, wanting to look younger…and I say that as a member of that generation!

Troy: Going back to our earlier topic, I’ll leave you with this: Weight is a symptom of something going on, it is not the problem.

Jill: Well basically what you’re saying, weight…being overweight, underweight, is not necessarily an indicator of health, but we make the assumption. The person, if they’re in a certain weight range, they’re healthy…if they’re out of that range, they’re not healthy. It’s an assumption, it isn’t grounded on fact.

The media has done a very good job of that.

Jill: Very good job. We also make assumptions that just because someone is overweight, that they just don’t eat right. We make a whole lot of assumptions of people on weight…people who are habitually thin, they can’t put on weight no matter how hard they try…they just have that kind of metabolism. People make assumptions about naturally thin people that are not grounded in fact, they’re simply projections or assumptions.

For More Information:

Empower Fitness Co Inc
1127 Southwest Morrison Street
Portland, OR 97205
(503) 274-2639

Jim Wilburn, a colleague and friend contacted me when he found out what our topic was for this issue. He volunteered to share his experience and story with all of you, in hopes that it may help someone else.

id Magazine: Thank you for volunteering for this interview…and from what I’ve learned weight really is on a individual basis, case by case situation. Like one person I know who’s struggled with their weight because of thyroid problems and other complications and hasn’t been able to lose the weight they they’ve wanted to…and they’re a fitness trainer.

Jim Wilburn: And that was the big thing with me that got me going on it was, I was 25 years old and my doctor put me on high blood pressure medicine and I was a 130-140 pounds overweight…my family’s history of stroke and heart disease is huge. Everybody in my family was obese. I know there’s genetics that play a role, but it’s habits too, growing up.

We ate a lot of processed foods, my mom wasn’t into fresh vegetables, she just had bags of frozen vegetables. There were the ceremonial trips to Costco and Price Club back in the day, and we roll out with two palettes full of food and stuff. Finally my doctor threatened to put me on blood pressure medicine before a couple of years before he actually did. I tried exercise, dieting and all of that, but finally I researched gastric by-pass and found that it worked.

The particular surgeon I went to in Los Angeles has performed it on celebrities, heads of state for various foreign nations. He pioneered this particular procedure that I had implemented. The reason I am able to maintain the weight loss i because I have a ring around the ouch that they created. A lot of doctors will just create a pouch, and the pouch will stretch in time.

Mine, they put a ring around it to restrict it from stretching. So it’s almost like I’ve got a band around it and so I have a 3oz. stomach now, where I used to have a 30oz. stomach. Quite a different size. Once that fills up, it tells your brain, “oh, I’m full,” so you eat half the food you used to eat.

I know at one time you mentioned your mother isn’t heavy, right?

She was…my mom and dad had the surgery. There’s ways to…I grew up, I was always the little fat kid. I grew up on diets. I was 16 and going to Jenny Craig, going once a week, eating their pre-packaged food. I did Weight Watchers, SlimFast, I did other diets. It usually in concert with my parents, they’d go on a diet and I’d do it with them. My brother was always skinny when we were kids. We always had to go buy him extra-slim jeans…and Sears was the only store to sell them, and I had the Husky Jeans. Now it’s the opposite. I’m smaller and he’s bigger because with time and age he’s let himself go and formed bad habits, once he got married and had kids. Habits change.

Sure, and stress…if you don’t have an outlet for stress.

So I decided that I wanted to be healthy. My biggest fear was having a heart attack or having a stroke either early in life or later in life. What could I do minimize those chances and live a healthier life? I mean I was 330 pounds at my heaviest. I was 285 pounds when I graduated high school…I was a big kid. At my biggest, I had a 54 inch waist and a 3X shirt. Now I have a 34 inch waist and depending on the shirt I wear a medium or a large.

So that was a big change. 20 inches of waist and five shirt sizes. That change happened over the course of 12 months. I had the surgery in July of 1999, and I was only out of work for two weeks.

Wow…that’s quick.

Yeah…and I had the open style, where they cut you between your sternum and belly-button. They cut an incision, went right through my abdominal muscles and so there was a little more down-time for that. My health insurance paid for it because I had ongoing joint issues in my knees from when I was a little kid. I went through physical therapy because of carrying extra weight, and I had high blood pressure… so those conditions are considered co-morbidities, considered morbid obesity. That’s what qualified me, because they considered it preventative care in their eyes and they took care of it. It was $20,000 back then. That was a day and a half in the hospital, I stayed in L.A. for a week.

A week later they have you drink a solution to do an upper G.I. to make sure there are no leaks. So they take X-rays to make sure there were no leaks, and everything is healing properly. There was a significant amount of care that was taken by the doctors too, after the surgery, so I knew it was a safe thing.

I think the biggest thing for me to wrap my mind around was that I could not eat a full plate of food. Right after the surgery, everything was swollen inside and all I could eat was a cup of soup…I got really depressed because I thought, “Is this all I’m ever going to be able to eat?” Once the swelling went down and things healed, I was able to eat a little bit more and little bit more. But even today, I can generally eat only half of a hamburger and 10 fries, and that’s it.

Any other restrictions?

I have to be selective about the food I eat. Different densities of food will fill me up faster. But then there’s things like popcorn…I can eat a medium size bucket of popcorn all by myself.

Then it’s all about your choices…

Absolutely. One of the great things about my surgeon is that he had support groups for his patients. That’s one thing that he did that not many surgeons do. Once a month in your town, in your city a group got together and talked about how this life changing thing affecting you, positively and negatively. In Reno we had a support group and that was really important.

I can see how that would be critical to the process.
I went from being huge, to now being socially acceptable by some standards, and I got attention I wasn’t used to. I got told when I was a kid or teenager, I was good looking for a fat guy. Or I was cute for a fat guy. At least that part hasn’t changed, the cute part!

I know you were married before, did your wife have the same issues?

No, she was skinny. I was 300 pounds when we got married. But I think it’s really interesting from my prospective to see how people approach you differently, how you’re included in things, you’re invited to parties. It’s just amazing how people treat you when you’re skinny as opposed to when you’re obese.

No kidding?

Absolutely. That was a big thing that I noticed and I’ve shred it with people that have gone through the same thing I’ve gone through with weight loss. It’s huge.

That’s another reason we’re doing this subject and shedding light on it is that people just don’t think about it. In doing some precursor research, I read some material on Jezebel.com by Kate Harding, she called herself Queen of the Fat-o-spehere. She posted some comments that people have posted on her site or columns, these comments were just vile and nasty! Awful stuff…and that’s where I learned the term Fat-Haters.

There’s a lot of health reasons… and as much as we’d like a simple answer or a right answer. It really is an individual thing. I know people, they couldn’t handle the surgery I had done. I had it done for my own reasons, it’s not the right solution for everybody. Nor is exercise or diets. It depends on your state of mind and your health. I was as healthy as a horse, aside form being morbidly obese and having high blood pressure. They’d do blood work on me and say, “OH you’re fine, your liver, your kidneys…everything’s all in good shape, it’s just that your heart’s gonna give up someday.”

The other thing, from a quality of life standpoint, when you’re carrying less weight, you have so much more physical ability. You’re more able to do more strenuous activities, whether it’s hiking or exercise. Little things like cleaning the house, we take for granted. You could be like, “Oh I’m going to clean the house…oh I’m so tired when I’m done,” I don’t feel tired when I’m done! The energy just builds up in me, where before it just wiped me out. Physical ability is one thing people don’t think about, they’re so focused on food.

I can enjoy the same foods that I used to enjoy before, it’s just that my body doesn’t absorb the fat. That’s because it bypasses the duodenum, which is the limb of the intestine just below the stomach. So the food doesn’t go through that any more. It goes from my esophagus into my intestine directly.

Your parents…and you, did you become successful then gain it back and then give up?

A mixture of everything. You know, human nature is that we’re lazy. It’s easier to give up than follow through sometimes. In so many diets you see results in the beginning…like these reality shows like Biggest Loser, I’ve seen a few episodes…you get to a point where you plateau, and you don’t or can’t lose any more weight for several weeks. It’s because your body starts to adjust to a different caloric intake and different activity level and what not. That’s where most people fall off the wagon, you get to that point and plateau with your weight loss…that can usually happen about three to four months into a diet.

Even though I’ve had this surgery, I still have to keep my activity level up. I could put on about 20 pounds…but I’m not going to put on 100 pounds. Now if I want to lose 20 pounds? I can lose that inside of two months, if I wanted to. If I put my mind to it and ate lots of fresh vegetables, lots of fiber, lots of protein, and a little fat for a month or two…I can drop weight like crazy. It’s amazing. Where as before, to drop the same amount of weight would take six months.

On the physical changes, another thing that you see is a change is your intimacy level in your relationships. That’s one of the big things that people noted in our support group was that their sex life got far more active when they lost weight, because they were more physically able to do different things and become more active for a longer period of time. And because they felt more attractive, that’s a huge thing! That’s a huge thing with obese people, because our society says, “Oh you’re fat and ugly.” that’s not necessarily true. I know people who are very, very attracted to obese people, physically and emotionally attracted to their personality.

But our society says, “You’re fat and ugly,” so when you go through this extreme weight loss and you just lost 100 pounds and ten pant sizes, you’re down to a level where you feel sexy again and you feel attractive.

More so if you have never known that or experienced it…

Right. I think the weight loss really helped me to come out of the closet because, while I loved my wife and I still talk to her to this day, we were married 13 years ago…I wanted to be with her because everybody thought I should be married to a woman and have children etc, etc. But myself deep down inside, I had insecurities and I had something that was secure. I had a relationship that was secure, with someone who loved me and I loved back.

As obese as I was, I knew I couldn’t go out and date whoever I wanted to date because not a lot of people are attracted to big people.
I put my heart and soul into the marriage for as long as I could…because I needed to come out of the marriage so I could come out of the closet. The weight loss really helped with that. Because I had seen the stereotypical gay community. The 20 inch waist with skin-tight boxer briefs and all that on every advertisement…you see that in the straight community too, they’re not all that different. But there’s still that image.

Peter Rossing Photo by Rosemary Ragusa

Portland has a unique arts community; it is diverse, wide open and very different from other cities. The city supports the performing and visual arts, and in this column I plan to touch base with the people who keep our arts community lively and diverse.

Recently I sat down to have a conversation with Peter Rossing, the owner of Muse Art & Design, the art supply store at 4224 S. E. Hawthorne. Peter is an entrepreneur and supporter of the arts in Portland. His career path has taken him from theatrical set design to general manager of the Portland Repertory Theater, and then to freelance graphic design, specializing in corporate events. It was a high-pressure environment, which Peter enjoyed, but didn’t find fulfilling. It did offer him and opportunity to exercise his organizational skills, and his love of pulling together many elements to create a cohesive end product. Somehow, Peter knew that there was something else that he wanted to do, but he wasn’t exactly sure what it was.

Then, one February morning, as these things will do, a clear vision of his future presented itself to Peter. He decided to open what is now Muse Art & Design. Art materials seemed like a natural fit for him given his background in graphic design, and there was room in Portland for a store selling quality artists supplies.

Opening new retail business in the space of under 10 months was a challenge, but Peter was up to it. He began by becoming a member of the National Art Materials Trade Association, an organization that supports retailers in the field. He went to their spring trade show and received a warm welcome from the members. They were eager to share information about the ins and outs of building a successful business. In addition, the vendors at the show were more than happy to schedule meetings with him to discuss their products. It was a positive experience that reinforced his decision to open the store.

Peter says that the two most difficult aspects of creating the business were finding a suitable space and creating a business plan. He knew that he wanted a space of about 1000 square feet, and that his preference was a location near his home in southeast Portland. Other than finding the right space and the right price, the biggest challenge was finding a space that was close to move-in ready. He finally found a space on S E Hawthorne near 42nd that was, though a bit smaller than he wanted, available and the move-in date met his timetable.

Peter shared with me the fact that creating his business plan was his most difficult challenge. He began trying to create a plan that would answer all of the potential questions that a lender might ask. Trying to anticipate all of those questions, and attempting to figure out what would please this unknown lender was truly daunting. Finally, Peter took deep breath and decided to write a plan for himself, and everything fell into place. This is a lesson that he has carried forward as the business has grown, and it is a piece of advice that his is more than willing to share with his artist customers.

Muse Art & Design, opened in November of 2004, and has become a welcoming place for serious artists as well as Sunday afternoon painters. Peter had a concept right from the start that he wanted to create a store with an atmosphere unlike most other art supply stores. Peter and his partner, Brian built all of the fixtures themselves, installed the halogen track lighting, and created the kind of visually appealing space that the former set designer had in mind. The store is easy to navigate, and the products are well displayed.

The idea of excellent service was foremost in Peter’s mind when he was planning the store. Peter and his employees are very helpful and knowledgeable about the products they sell, and are willing to share their expertise. They are also willing to go the extra mile for special orders, checking out suppliers on the internet and finding the best product. Peter’s philosophy about stocking products involves doing extensive research and then stocking the best quality at several price levels. So, they carry excellent quality materials that are appropriate for the most experienced artist and the novice as well. This may well explain the fact that Peter’s store has weathered the economic downturn very well, with his year on year sales continually improving.

In addition to investing in traditional advertising, Peter has taken advantage of exposure on the web to promote the store. The constantly evolving Muse Art & Design web site, www.museartanddesign.com, will soon have a more detailed description of the products they stock, and in the near future and additional web site, www.encausticsupplies.com, will be a one-stop shopping resource for all the encaustic supplies you might need.

Peter supports the Portland art scene in other ways. He sits on the board of Bouand Dance Company, a contemporary ballet company lead by artistic director Alex Ballard. He uses the store to support local visual artists by displaying their work. Peter shared with me how much he enjoys seeing artists blossom and gain confidence by having their work displayed and appreciated. As he said to me, “I have had the experience of seeing an artist who had just been painting for herself, and who was too shy to share her work with others, becoming confident enough to call herself an artist, after hanging her work in the store.” It is clear from the look on his face that he finds that part of his work extremely fulfilling.

April brings the second annual An Artist-a-Day event at Muse Art & Design in which every day in April a different artist will be in the store creating a work in the medium of their choice. All of the work will be on display in the store, and will be available for a silent auction in early May, the proceeds of which benefit Schoolhouse Supplies. Last year the event raised more than $3,000 dollars, which purchased art supplies for the Portland Public Schools. Details about the event and to read the daily blogs about the artists, visit www.anartistaday.com.

Peter feels that the core strength of the Portland art scene is the ability of artists to get their work out and seen. There are so many venues for work to be displayed; coffee shops, restaurants, retail spaces are all eager to show the work of local artists. This independent scene does lack cohesion, but it also creates an atmosphere that allows the work of all kinds of creatives to be seen, and creates an environment that encourages artists to explore non-traditional outlets for their work. Peter has observed that most of the working artists he knows make their living through internet sites such as Etsy and Ebay, as well as through networking and by coming to the attention of collectors. The traditional path of depending on galleries to display and sell work is not necessary in the wide open atmosphere here in Portland.

I think that Peter’s message to us Portland artists is the one that made him move forward with the store; do it for yourself. Find your vision, believe in it, do the work and put it out there.

Muse Art & Supply
Monday-Saturday 11am-6pm
Sunday 12pm-5pm
4224 Southeast Hawthorne Boulevard
Portland, OR 97215-3161
(503) 231-8704

Rasha Spindel Photo by Rosemary Ragusa

Could you give me a little bit about your background – I know you grew up in Hawaii, and how you came to Portland.

I was born and raised in beautiful Honolulu, Hawai’i. It was the best place in the world to grow up being from such a diverse family. My Mom, Fauna Hodel, wanted to raise my sister and I in a place that was a melting pot of cultures. My sister and I have different fathers. Her father is African American, and my father is a European Mutt, so our Mom raised my sister, Yvette, and I to accept everyone, and to never see color, race, sexual orientation, or even size. I went back and forth between the home with my Mom, Aunty Liliane, and sister, and the home with my father and step-mother from the time I was 5. I was raised in a Hawaiian culture on my Mom’s side, and since my step-mother is Japanese, a very Asian upbringing with my father’s side. My step-mother was offered a position with the Oregon Government my senior year of high school in 1997, so we moved to Portland. Luckily, my sister had moved here to model as well, so I had a built in support system when I arrived. My father and step-mother moved back to Hawai’i after getting homesick, so I ended up following my sister to L.A. at the end of 1998. I ended up coming back to Portland in 2003 when I signed with Q6 Model & Artist Management soon after I got engaged to my now ex-husband. I go home to the islands to visit often, though. Being from Hawai’i, it never leaves you.

What was your childhood like being plus-size?

Growing up in Hawai’i, being taller than everyone else, and curvier than everyone else, I stuck out. I have been curvy my entire life, and I always wanted to “fit in” with all of my tiny friends, but I was taught from a very young age by my Mom, and my (size 2) sister that I was beautiful no matter what. We are all beautiful in our own way, in our own bodies. I learned to accept my body, and my curves. I have been an athlete most of my life, playing softball since I was 7 years old, so I have always tried my best to be fit and healthy.

When and how did you become a plus-size model?

My sister has been a successful working model for as long as I can remember. Yvette encouraged me to become a plus-size model, and set up a meeting with her Portland agent, Justin Habel at Q6 in 2003. I took a few polaroids, and I was booked for my first runway show within a week. I started testing with photographers in Portland and Seattle, and I have been a working model ever since.

What do you think of the perception that Plus-size models (or people for that matter) are unhealthy and lazy?

I think that is insane! Just because you are plus-size that does not automatically make you unhealthy or lazy! Stereotypes like that are so hurtful! I had my doctor tell me the other day (after seeing my lab work) that I am one of the healthiest curvy people he has ever seen. It doesn’t matter that I am not skinny. I am healthy, and incredibly active!

I’ve gathered from my research that you are comfortable with your body and have accepted your biology…what lead you to this acceptance?

It honestly has a lot to do with my family, and the way that I was raised to feel beautiful no matter what. I also have a partner who thinks I am the sexiest person in the world, and she tells me so every day. I am not going to pretend that I have always felt this way, because I have my bad days where I am not comfortable with my body. There are some days I wish I could squeeze into a smaller size, but I know at the end of the day I am beautiful inside and out.

How did you get on “The Biggest Loser-Couples Edition”?

I sent in a videotape, auditioning on my own, and was approached by producers to star in their first Couples Edition. My then fiancée was the smallest man ever cast on the show (he literally only had a beer belly weighing only 240 pounds). He went on the show to support me and my dreams.

What was that experience like?

It was an amazing roller coaster ride. I lost 70 pounds in 5 months, and went from a size 18/20 down to a size 10/12. It was a whirlwind of grueling workouts, cameras, producers, talk shows (I even got married on “Inside Edition”). I loved every gut-wrenching second of it. Looking back now, though, in my heart, I knew I wasn’t supposed to marry him. I was just caught up in it all, and I was with someone who loved me with all his heart.

When did you come out and how did that come
to be?

Looking back now, I have been gay from the day I was born, but I didn’t actually admit it to myself until I was 30. After being with my husband for almost 7 years (actually married for over 3), I ended up having a crush on a girl I played softball with. It was the first time I actually admitted to myself that I wanted to “be” with a woman. Rather than act on it, I told my husband that I had a crush on someone. His first questions was, “Is it a guy or a girl?” I ended up separating from him while I went to therapy to figure it all out. I wasn’t sure if I was Bi or Gay. Up until that point, I had only been with men. I had never enjoyed being intimate with a man, and my therapist told me that I wouldn’t actually know I was gay until I slept with a woman. – Boy, was she right! During the separation (after which, my divorce quickly followed), I fell in love with the first woman I ever kissed. Up until that point, I had just thought something was wrong with me. As soon as I realized I was gay, everything made so much sense. I have never been happier with my love life. The only real downfall to coming out has been the fact that I no longer have a relationship with my father and step-mother (after coming out to them in July 2009). It broke my heart, but that is their burden to bear, not mine. I have enough love and support from the rest of my family.

Who is and how did you meet your “future” wife?

Vanna Pecoraro is my future wife, best friend, and the love of my life. I actually met her through performing in Portland. I first saw Vanna performing in Drag as Emilio in the Fall of 2008, and I was blown away by her talent and sexy stage presence. We ended up officially meeting and becoming friends in the Spring of 2009. Our friendship ended up turning into love at just the right time in both of our lives. Vanna is a Retired Police Officer, born in L.A., but raised in Argentina. She has been such an incredible sparkle in my life, and I am the luckiest woman on the planet!

Tell me about your girl group you sing in, where do you perform, who are the members etc?

I am so ridiculously proud to be a member of The B.B Dolls! We are a plus-size performance troupe (think plus-size Pussycat Dolls) who have stamped our name onto Portland’s performance art scene. We are proving that sex appeal and attitude exist regardless of size. The members are: myself, founder Danielle Ward, a.k.a. “Stellah”, and Tamra Scanlan, a.k.a. “Talulah”. We sing, dance, and perform our hearts out! Please come see us perform! We perform all over Portland and Vancouver at such venues as The Egyptian Room, Holocene, North Bank, The Bite of Oregon, Portland Pride. You can find The B.B. Dolls on Facebook, or for bookings, please contact bookings@TheBBDolls.com

How long have you been singing?

I have been singing since I was a kid, but this is the first time I have sang in a group, and I love it! Being in The B.B. Dolls has given me such a love for music again. Being surrounded by such talented ladies as Danielle and Tamra is pretty inspiring. Those girls can blow!

What does the future look like for you and your career?

On the home front, in addition to playing Softball all summer, we are planning an intimate wedding for 08/28/10. We will follow the wedding up with trips to Vancouver BC, Hawai’i and Argentina, then we are planning on starting a family. As far as my career goes, I am going to continue to model and perform. The B.B. Dolls show schedule looks pretty full over the next few months, and I am going to enjoy the ride! Having such a full and rich life has distracted me a little from writing, but I do plan on finishing my book this year. I am going to try to inspire other people to love themselves no matter what, one person at a time!

You can find The B.B. Dolls on Facebook, or for bookings, please contact bookings@TheBBDolls.com